can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
