yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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