it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I need moral support for this bender
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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