At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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