i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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