I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
