Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
