you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I AM VODKA MAN
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
