I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
