They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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