I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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