Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
