how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
