How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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