I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
