omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
