NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
