Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
