we're blogging at a bar
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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