I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
