I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
