Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
