oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
