That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
