She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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