I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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