watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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