I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
