Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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