I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Randomize
