but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize