Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
