I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
