also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
