I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
