so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
