just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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