Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Randomize
