Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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