come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Randomize
