There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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