Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
