Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
did i just pee glitter
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
