their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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