oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I want to have your abortion
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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