I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
