well most of my day revolves around power hour
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
