but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
is wine microwaveable?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize