Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
