in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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